Believe-A-Bear's are now available to order and I have made the price £10 to maximise the donations for my two charities Invisiyouth & Lyme Disease UK. You can find all the info and product details on my shopping page or by clicking on the Believe-A-Bear picture in the upper right corners of every page. I am excited that we have bears in an assortment of different shades of beige, making every bear truly unique and different in its own special way. I know I have spoken a lot about this project over the last few days especially, so go and check them out and buy a truly special gift for your loved one this Christmas.
What a week we have ahead.
As always the doctors was an adventure this morning. Unable to get blood out of me ( no shock there ) but we had to draw bloods via my hands WHICH I HATE. It is far more painful and I nearly always end up losing feeling in my hands which I never get back.
Added salt to the wound is that my stomach and kidney's as you all know are causing me great issues recently. I can't taste ANYTHING anymore, everything just tastes of plastic... of nothing. No matter how spicy, it won't affect me ( trust me). It is awful! I love my food and to not enjoy it to the full is very upsetting to me. I think this is due to acid reflux and the constant feeling of nausea, stemming from bad digestion and pain. It isn't just affecting me physically now, but the emotional pain is often worse than the physical. The physical pain makes daily life hard but if you can even enjoy the simple pleasures the same, it all just gets too much. My migraines too are becoming more of an issue, everyday with no rest-bite. I can't think, I can't watch TV and so you leave yourself becoming very irritable.
I am guilty of burying myself in work to distract myself from the real issues that are going on. I know my health isn't good and I have known for a long time, I just choose to ignore a lot of it. The doctors say I am stable so I don't want to moan. My consultant down South is concerned however and is running tests to try and get to the bottom of it all.
I have my days, like anyone battling chronic illness does, we wonder why we continue to fight, our bodies feel like they are packing in on us. WHY? We can't even enjoy a cup of tea without it tasting like dish water or enjoy our food which we need to live yet it makes us feel so rotten and adds to our pain. We become frustrated at ourselves and our circumstances. We aren't ungrateful, just sometimes we long for a break.
I have another four weeks to wait for my results from the tests I have had sent to America. Four weeks seems like a lifetime away when I am barely keeping my head above water now. I have so much to do, so much I want to enjoy. I am SO grateful for all the AMAZING opportunities I have and continue to be given. I am not ungrateful in the slightest. I just want to ENJOY them fully without feeling rotten.
TOMORROW check out the CHAT magazine. My article on LYME DISEASE did so well in September that they are re-printing the article in the Christmas addition of the magazine which is coming on our shelves TOMORROW. So grab yourselves a copy.
Wednesday , we hit the road ready for London, ready for the European Diversity Awards on Thursday night. I am SO EXCITED for this event. It will be a truly amazing and inspiring night. Before hitting Newbury for 60th birthday celebrations. So we have quite a week - FULL ON week planned and I truly hope I can enjoy every minute without feeling rotten to taint my memories.
Keep up to date, right here with all the adventures to come. It is going to be a manic run up to Christmas I can assure you.
Love always,
S xo