My Heart In Your Hands
- Sophie Ward
- Jun 15, 2018
- 3 min read


The topic today I want to bring up is one that is deeply close to me.
When it comes to chronic illness, we don't just have the daily symptoms to cope with and get through life adapting all the time. We also harbour a lot of heartache and sadness from broken relationships, lost friendships and lack of family support.
I am so very lucky that I have a seriously strong support network and am lucky enough to meet new, inspiring people everyday . I know how lucky I am and I am truly grateful but it doesn't mean I haven't experienced serious heart ache and pain. I have and I will openly admit to that. I am guilty of pushing people away to protect them, shielding my true feelings and l hurting myself further believing I am doing the right thing. I do, do the right thing. At the time to the outside world it may look cruel, cold and heartless but in the long-term it helps them build a life without pain and suffering. We, then live with the pain and suffering.
We often sit there, feeling hard done to as to why people can go out and enjoy life, feel love and have what seems to be - it all. We have to focus on the positives and have hope that if we can safely say we always used our heart, shared kindness and took problems on with love. If we do that, we aren't guilty of any sins. Everyone, whether they suffer with chronic illness or not, are not immune to loss and heartache. Every human being has experience these hardships throughout their lives. It's how we bounce back, handle the situation and ourselves which is important.
So what's the answer?
There isn't an answer - that is the answer. That fact doesn't bring us comfort, I know.
We are allowed to mourn losses, but we can't allow them to take over our lives and affect how we choose to live. The right people will be around you through thick and thin and we must celebrate and appreciate these heroes! They really are heroes because as we have seen and know from experience, not everyone is strong enough to take the challenge of having you in their life.
They are proof there are people out their in the world that will be strong enough and DO have the heart to fight with you.
People come in and out of our lives from reasons that are often unknown to us at first but are revealed years later. We learn, like with everything through experiences. My time travelling and building up the confidence to meet new people has allowed me to become more open-minded and have hope.
I once was a girl, so invisible, shy and felt unlovable. In many ways, I still have these days. Having my blog, traveling and having to face such harsh critics head on has taught me that, being me should be enough. I have flaws, so does EVERYONE. J am not the only one with less that perfect flaws- perfection doesn’t exist. I used to hide them and now I just own them because its a great way to filter out the people who will walk away easily and it saves a lot of hurt in the process.
We must not give up on the dream of finding true friends, soul-mates and strengthening family relationships. We all know love is the best medicine and really enhances our lives. We must keep that dream and goal in our sights.
Not only that but we must realise that we do deserve love and true friendships. Our conditions and less than ideal life doesn’t mean that we deserve anything less than the best. We will always give anyone and everyone our best and so that is what we deserve in return. Illness does not change this. We are worthy and we do have purpose.
I channel my hurt and pain into my work. Being proactive and helping others helps heal my own personal hurt because seeing others happy reminds me how powerful love is and that it is all around us. That knowledge in itself fills us with faith and helps us heal open wounds.
We lose some but believe me, the people we gain are far more valuable and important. Focusing more on the love we do feel and have surrounding us is super important.
We may not think there is any around us.
Believe me, there is and it’s often found in the most unpredictable places.
Have faith and give love to those who give you love back.
We are never alone.
We are never alone.
Someone thinks the world of you and so many love you dearly - more than words can express.
S
Xoxo
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